This doesn’t mean you have to completely forget about the past or future. Consider them when you make decisions, but save your energy for the present.
The more you try to not think about something, the more your brain will fixate on it. Let your feelings and thoughts flow uninterrupted.
The 4-7-8 Technique: Inhale through your nose for 4 seconds. Hold your breath for 7 seconds, then exhale through your mouth for 8 seconds. Repeat. Resonant Breathing: Sit upright and repeat inhaling for 5 seconds and then exhaling for 5 seconds. Do this for several minutes daily. Box Breathing: Inhale through your nose for 4 seconds, then hold for 4 seconds. Exhale through your mouth for 4 seconds, then hold for 4 seconds.
Imagine your best friend is distant and constantly on their phone. It’s more likely they’re talking to a crush than ignoring you because they’re upset. Say your spouse is moody and constantly sending emails. Instead of assuming they’re cheating, recognize it’s more likely they’re working hard on a project. Most of the time, the worst-case scenario your mind comes up with is not the most likely one.
Frame “I’m going to make a mistake if I text my ex” like an opinion (“I feel like it’s a mistake to text them”). Then ask objective questions—why would it be a mistake? What’s likely to happen? Questioning your thoughts objectively helps point out flawed or self-limiting thought patterns and helps you approach your feelings like a third party.
Try journaling or talking with a friend to put your thoughts out there and pinpoint places where you’re making assumptions. When you’re free of assumptions, you’ll feel less overwhelmed and have a clearer mind to solve problems with.
Write your pro-con list down so you can clearly see your train of thought and look at it with a fresh perspective. Try using if-then statements. For example, “If I move to New York City, then I will have the opportunity to pursue my dream job. ”
Worst-case scenarios: You exaggerate a negative outcome of a situation and think that you’ll be unable to cope. Harsh self-criticizing: You judge yourself by rules you think you should be following and label yourself negative things like undeserving or useless. Black-and-white thinking: You think in extreme all-or-nothing terms where outcomes are perfect or terrible with no possible middle ground.
Sit or lay in a comfy position and tell yourself “I’m going on vacation!” to get in the right headspace. Let yourself feel and experience whatever emotions come up during your break without trying to push anything away. It might help to reflect on past experiences that were relaxing or that bring you peace and joy.
Remember, this is a short-term solution. If you’re frequently feeling confused or conflicted, there’s a deeper underlying cause that needs to be addressed.
“I feel confused right now and I’ll take things one day at a time. ” “I can always find something to be grateful for. ” “I’m not alone. I have people who can help me through this. ”
Aerobic exercise releases endorphins, adrenaline, cortisol, and other chemicals and hormones that elevate your mood and make you feel better physically.
Keep a pen and paper handy at all times to make journaling throughout the day easier. Only share your journal entries if you want to. They’re your private thoughts and you can do what you like with them.
Tense each muscle group for about 5 seconds before releasing. Focus on deep breathing between tenses. Feel your body relax deeper and deeper each time you relax a muscle group. Imagine your stress, anxiety, and confusion melting away.
A new household skill like baking or feng shui. Something athletic like training for a 10K or recreational sports. An artistic hobby or personal interest like learning a musical instrument or gardening.
Talking out loud helps you analyze your own thought patterns and relieves some of the stress you feel inside. Clarify what you want from your listener—do you just want to talk at someone? Do you want them to actively chime in with suggestions and observations?
An uncontrollable burst of racing or confusing thoughts is called a “flight of ideas. ” It’s sometimes seen in people with anxiety, bipolar disorder, ADHD, or drug addictions. Try a therapist-finding site like BetterHelp to help find and choose a therapist.
Cold, clammy skin or uncontrollable shivering. Dizziness or feeling faint. A fast pulse, fever, or headache. Slow or rapid breathing. Inability to remember your name or other personal information.
