You won’t need a lot of props for this. Get a box of tissues and carry them around with you. you can either sneeze into or wipe your nose in them. While your nose is in the tissue, rub it a lot to make it look red. Make sure to use plenty of them. Applying a small amount of pale makeup will help you be slightly more convincing. A bit of white powder or pale foundation is all you’ll need to give yourself a pasty look. [2] X Research source
If you’re afraid you can’t be convincing enough, you can always take laxatives. However, try to avoid this route if at all possible, since it will be very unpleasant for you. Be prepared to jump up in the middle of class with a stricken look on your face and run to the bathroom. Applying a subtle amount of pale makeup will help you pull this off. You can easily put the makeup on when you sprint to the bathroom.
When faking a cold/flu, make sure to start coughing, sneezing and blowing your nose as soon as class starts. If you cough really hard, it will make your throat a little scratchy and raspy and make you sound even sicker. Look rumpled, tired and unkempt. Ask your teacher for cough drops or lozenges if you are faking a cold/flu. [7] X Research source
If you’re faking a cold/flu, put a little blush or red makeup on the tip of your nose and in the inside corners of your eyes. This will give the appearance of sinus issues. Don’t overdo the makeup. You want it to look realistic. It shouldn’t be obvious that you have any on. If you need to, practice getting the right look at home the day before.
Drink a small amount of water, slightly reluctantly, or a Sprite/7-Up. These beverages are well-known for relieving nausea. [8] X Research source Ginger ale is another beverage option that people drink to help ease nausea.
Avoid sitting up straight at your desk – slump down and keep your eyes fixed on the surface of your desk. When you stand up from your desk, sway side to side a little so that you seem dizzy and lightheaded. Grab your desk so that it looks like you’re trying to support yourself.
Both vomiting and diarrhea usually strike suddenly, which is why you need to sprint like it’s an emergency. Make sure your facial expression conveys panic when you jump up. It will probably help to shout “I’m sorry!” over your shoulder as you head out the door, so that your teacher knows something is wrong. Sound as upset as you can when you say it.
Dampen the hair at your temples slightly. This will make it look like you’ve been sweating.
If you are faking a stomach flu, clutch your stomach and say, “This is so embarrassing, but I have diarrhea. I just got very sick in the bathroom. What should I do, do you think it will come back?” Look extremely humiliated. [11] X Research source If you are faking a migraine, look nauseous and squint at any bright lights, then say, “My head is pounding and I feel really dizzy. I just threw up in the bathroom and I’m kind of freaked out by how much it hurts. Is something wrong with me?” If you’re faking a cold/flu, speak with a scratchy voice and say, “I feel really awful. My body aches all over and my head feels weird. I feel really cold, but I keep sweating. What does that mean?”
Apologize to your teacher and avoid asking to go to the nurse. Instead, say something like, “I don’t know what to do. I feel so awful. What do you think I should do?” Let your teacher suggest that you see the nurse.
In almost all cases, the deciding factor for you going home is whether or not you have a fever. All of these illnesses, except migraines, cause fever. This step won’t work if using an ear or forehead thermometer. [12] X Trustworthy Source Mayo Clinic Educational website from one of the world’s leading hospitals Go to source When the nurse takes your temperature, it needs to be 100°F (37°C) or higher.
Make sure you look awful when you walk into the nurse’s office. Repeat whatever you told your teacher and be as convincing as possible. Don’t overdo it! School nurses have heard every excuse in the book. It will be obvious to the nurse that you’re faking if you over-act.
If you’re trying to fake a cold/flu say, “My body aches all over and my head is pounding. " Have tissues with you and use them in front of the nurse. Avoid breathing through your nose so that you sound stuffy. [14] X Research source If you’re trying to fake a migraine/vomiting say, “I’ve never had a headache this bad before. It hurts so much that I feel nauseous. I just threw up in the bathroom. " Squint and mention that lights and loud sounds make the headache worse. If you’re trying to fake a stomach flu/diarrhea say, “I’m very nauseous and my stomach is cramping up. I have bad diarrhea and I’m afraid something embarrassing might happen. " Be sure to clutch your lower abdomen and look a bit dizzy and sweaty.
You can return all the way back to normal after two days or so. If you were faking a cold/flu, try to cough occasionally when you return to class for at least a day or two.
